


Snow way out

by TyrantTirade



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alcohol, Bad Humor, Banter, Bottom Bucky Barnes, Cabin Fic, Christmas Fluff, Falling In Love, Fluff and Smut, Gift Fic, Idiots in Love, Kinda?, Kissing, Language, M/M, Smut, Snowed In, probably too much of that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-25 19:48:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17127635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TyrantTirade/pseuds/TyrantTirade
Summary: The call barely goes through, Natashas voice lagging in and out until it becomes more clear. Steve hopes that it stays that way for at least a few minutes, long enough to figure out what to do to salvage the situation. So much for a winter vacation, he thinks.“So,” he starts, “I think there's a blizzard here.”





	Snow way out

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Hadespuppy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hadespuppy/gifts).



> For [Hadespuppy!](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hadespuppy) Who asked for a canadian shack fic that i sort of took in a not so canadian or shack direction but still hopefully delivered. 
> 
> It's been several months since i've written so working on this (and having the drive to) has been refreshingly a lot of fun. 
> 
> Thanks to [Bo](http://bereftandbreathless.tumblr.com) for the beta, for the help all around on this, and for just being an angel. And to [Rb](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Werewolfinthetardis) for listening to me babble about writing this for the past month.

The call barely goes through, Natashas voice lagging in and out until it becomes more clear. Steve hopes that it stays that way for at least a few minutes, long enough to figure out what to do to salvage the situation.

So much for a winter vacation, he thinks. 

“So,” he starts, “I think there's a blizzard here.”

They got to the cabin a few hours ago, not quite in the middle of nowhere but pretty close. The original idea was for them to buy some things they'd need, get there early while Nat and Sam were working, and check the place out.

However, on the way snow unexpectedly started coming down. And now, an hour later, just a few minutes after they got in and put some things up the snow is falling heavily. 

So much so that Steve can't see anything past the porch of the cabin.

Natasha breathes out a scoff over the line, “I think there's a blizzard here too.”

Steve feels panic coming on, knowing that if it’s where Nat is a few hours away it probably won't end soon. He realizes quickly that they're probably going to be stuck for awhile. 

At least with a blizzard there they could all find a way to enjoy the week. “Are you gonna have time to get here?” he asks quickly, hoping that the answer is yes.

Natasha sighs, sounding annoyed, “Now? No,” she states bluntly, “I can't even see out the window, Sam's got it on the news and it's calling for a winter weather warning.” 

“What the fuck,” Bucky says in the background, getting Steve's attention.

He has the tv at their cabin on too, tuned onto the weather channel where a meteorologist is across the screen, radar up.

“What?” Steve asks, dreading the response he might get.

“It's calling for like a foot of snow by tonight, like it’s a full on blizzard.”

Steve sighs, pulling his phone up to his ear again, “What happened to light sleet and partly cloudy?”

“Well Steve,” Natasha says sarcastically, “The weatherman must not be so good at his job.”

Steve doesn't respond, he just goes back to their previous conversation. “So can you really not make it? Even if you leave now?” he sighs.

“We haven't even put the bags in the car, it started coming down hard before I even left work and by the time I got out of the station I could barely even see to get home. So no, I sincerely doubt that we can leave.”

Steve lets out another sigh, deciding to just drop it for now. “Fine, just, keep me updated.” There's no point in stressing over it now. 

Maybe if they're lucky it'll end during the night and by morning all the roads will be salted and it'll be no problem at all. He can spend one night alone with Bucky. He's his best friend, they've done it a hundred times before. It's already the afternoon as is and dark outside so, he hopes they can just make it through the night.

“If it clears up tonight we'll try to head out, if not then we'll be there tomorrow,” Natasha concludes.

Steve responds with a very unenthusiastic “Okay,” as he lets Natasha finish, saying goodbye before he hangs up the call. 

—  
“So they aren't coming?” Bucky asks once he's done, still staring ahead at the tv.

Steve shoves his phone in the pocket of his jeans as he sighs again, “Probably not tonight.”

It's not, that, big of a deal, he thinks, at least he and Bucky are there, the power is on, they brought food and Bucky's playstation and down in the basement is a bar with a pool table. So it isn't like they are stranded in the wilderness with nothing to keep them occupied. Steve just feels slightly annoyed that their big getaway plans never seem to go the way they want. It's always something, someone sick, someone flaking, something.

Steve throws himself back onto the couch beside Bucky, letting out a groan as he scrubs his hands over his face.

“Dont stress Steve,” Bucky chimes in, clearly noticing Steve's frustration “They'll be here tomorrow, and for today you and I can just enjoy the place. I can't be that bad to be stuck with,” he says, chuckling.

Steve feels himself grin, instantly getting a little defensive, “Shut up,” he says, “You already know you're my favorite person.” Which is an understatement if anything.

“So, we can watch a movie, cook some dinner, figure out what room we want,” Bucky responds, “And then, you can get your ass beat by your favorite person at pool.”

Steve smirks hard at that, glancing in Bucky's direction, allowing that smirk to turn into something more like a deadpan, “Everyone knows you blow at pool,” he blurts.

Even Bucky knows, which is clearly why he's got a big shit eating grin across his face. “Everyone does know I blow.”

All Steve can do is roll his eyes.

—  
They go through the rooms, it's a four bedroom cabin with two bathrooms. They already know ahead of time to give Natasha the one with the ensuite, neither of them have the balls to even dispute that. 

The other three bedrooms are mostly the same, somewhat spacious with queen size beds, just your everyday bedrooms. The walls just wooden logs in true cabin fashion.

But Bucky still manages to make a big deal out of which room is his, claiming the bedroom across from the bathroom like he really has to put up a fight for it. 

Steve laughs at him, shaking his head as he throws his bags into the room down the hall from it. Leaving the other room next to the bathroom for sam. 

Assuming that he isn't picky like Bucky and Natasha are. 

—  
Steve works on unpacking his things, at least enough that it’s organized so he's not having to toss things in and out of his suitcase for the next week just to find a single item. 

That and, Steve is a bit particular, he likes to keep things where they belong. Unlike Bucky who he imagines by the end of the week will have half of his things strung out across the floor. 

Which, speaking of Bucky, suddenly, very muffled, Steve hears his name being called out by him. 

He’s pretty sure if his door weren’t open he wouldn't hear him at all. 

Quickly he sets down the shirt he’s folding and walks to the door so he can lean his head out into the hall, bracing his weight on the door jamb as he yells “Yes?”

A few seconds later he hears footsteps thunking up the stairs, coming up from the basement. So he stays where he's at until he gets his answer. 

Bucky rounds the corner with a grin on his face, “Quit folding you old fuck, I wanna get wasted.”

Steve rolls his eyes hard, refusing to let Bucky think he’s as cool as he thinks he is, “The last time you got wasted it was on piña coladas and I had to hold your hair back while you puked.” 

Bucky glares at him, like Steve's killed his fun so Steve continues, “And then you cried to me about how much I mean to you.”

Bucky scoffs, eyes rolling, “This is why I only say things when I’m drunk.”

“You say a lot of things all the time,” Steve teases. 

Bucky shoots him a look like, okay Steve time to shut your mouth and then turns around to walk off. 

Steve makes sure to get a final word in though, “You're still a pretty swell guy though.”

—  
Once Steve finally makes his way down into the basement he cant see Bucky at first, his eyes scan the room, across the bar and on the couches and around the pool table and Bucky’s nowhere to be seen. 

Steve keeps his hand on the rail, about to twist and go back up until from the corner of his eye he sees Bucky raise from behind the bar, thunking a glass bottle down onto the counter. 

Quickly Bucky looks up at him with a grin as he sets down some shot glasses too. “We're trapped for the night,” he says, “So we might as well get drunk.”

To begin with Steve didn't really want to drink this week, he figured that kind of thing is more suited for weekend boredom rather than a week in a cabin in the mountains. 

But...Bucky starts pouring a glass and Steve considers that it might be fun so he gives a mental screw it, and heads over to sit on a barstool across from his friend.

“Hey,” Bucky starts, “I’ve always wanted to be a bartender.” 

Steve shakes his head and chuckles but agrees, “Alright, so since we’re stuck in the snow with no actual bartender in sight I guess you're gonna have to do.” He says, as if it’s a bigger deal than it is. 

So Bucky excitedly slaps his hands down on the surface of the counter, “What can I get you, sir?”

—  
They both end up getting just on the right side of tipsy on some shots of grey goose. It’s not quite the wasted that Bucky wanted, but it's tame enough that no one will have to explain something awful like a massive stain on the area rug from someone’s uncontrollable puke-splosion.

Steve laughs at the thought, but knows that it’s real serious business. So much so that when Bucky slaps down another bottle, about to crack the seal Steve puts a stop to that real quick. “No, no,” Steve giggles like the drunk that he feels like. “No more,” he gives his best pleading face, “This is enough.”

Bucky stares at him for a second, expressionless before his mouth curls up into a grin. “What? You can’t handle it?” he asks, eyebrow cocking. 

And- well yes slightly, but Steve's also pretty sure Bucky can't either. “I don't think either of us can right now,” he says. 

Bucky gives him a look, thoughtful almost, clearly considering how he feels before he grabs the bottle back in hand and lazily chucks it back in the cabinet. “Fine, but we're gonna play pool now.”

For some unknown reason Steve's mind supplies that Bucky's adamancy to play a game he's not even good at with Steve is somehow very cute and then suddenly his mind is also saying, ‘kiss him, kiss him you coward’ and- Steve quickly knocks that thought away because as nice as it would be in concept, in practice it wouldn't go down so well. That's your bestfriend you idiot, don't be stupid, he thinks to himself. They're both into dudes and Steve's been into Bucky for a very long time but that doesnt mean Bucky's into him.

Steve grabs a pool cue, thankful that he at least has his drunk brain to blame for his actual brains stupidity. 

—  
As they play a few rounds of pool, the realization of just how bad Bucky is really starts setting in for Steve. 

He hits maybe 3 balls head on, can barely hold the pool cue, and he manages to knock his cue ball in more than any other ball. 

But watching him is hilarious. 

Steve realizes that while he's tipsy, Bucky is drunk. Maybe not plastered, not quite sloppy. But he laughs and trips on his sock and then proceeds to laugh about that, and then says something dumb to Steve about wanting cake. 

And, Steve will admit that he's a people pleaser to begin with, especially under the influence. 

So after several moments of debating Steve just decides, screw it, he’s gonna make some food.

He sets his pool stick down and heads for the stairs. 

“Where are you going?” Bucky asks, the sadness evident in his voice, and- that’s also cute, Steve thinks. 

He smiles and says, “I'm gonna see if I can make cake, loser.”

Bucky just sighs dreamily, letting out a groaned “mmm cake.”

—  
But there is no cake. If Steve were in his right mind he would know that they didn't purchase the ingredients for cake. 

Instead Bucky sits on the counter and watches from over Steve's shoulder as he cooks some boxed pancakes. 

Now he's groaning, “Mmm, pancakes,” as if cake was never even a thought.

Steve's just happy to be there.

—  
After eating what was probably an unhealthy amount of carb filled pancakes they both stomp back down into the cabin’s basement, getting back to pool. 

And- Steve feels some sentimental feeling go through him, spurting out, “I'm glad it's you I'm stuck with.” But then in an attempt to not sound like a complete bitch he follows that with, “I'd probably be crying from all the bullying I have to endure if I were stuck with Natasha.”

Bucky grins, shaking his head, “She just knows you'll take it, Steve. You're good at taking it.”

Steve grabs some chalk, grinding it into his que before he responds, “How do you know I'm not a giver?” and- for a split second he considers that maybe this kind of conversation isn't the thing he should be having with his best friend while he's drunk and easily swayed but, well he has no self-control.

Bucky's eyebrows raise easily, smile still up, “I don't doubt that.”

—  
They play another round of pool. All the way up until Bucky's complete lack of pool competence drives Steve completely insane.

“Stop, stop.” he says, already headed to Bucky's end of the table to demonstrate at least how to hold the stick.

“Right,” he starts, stepping up against Bucky's positioning his hands right where Steve wants them to be on the stick. “Just- curve your hand and brace the cue against your thumb, you don't hold the thing, you're not letting it slide.”

Bucky, in front of him lets out a chuckle, head turning some to look at Steve behind him and Steve feels his hair brush over his chest. 

And, that really sets in how close Steve has managed to get himself against him. And then that realization sets in how actually close Steve's whole body is, chest to back, pelvis to ass. And- Steve has to back away because suddenly his head is thinking, ‘I could bend him over this table as we speak’ which is both disturbing and very arousing. The latter of the two the more concerning since his dick is pressed against Bucky's soft ass. 

He tries to play it off by slapping Bucky's shoulder before turning to walk back to his own side, saying “Now maybe you'll finally play worth a damn.”

—  
But he doesn't.

Steve realizes that Bucky is just naturally worthless at pool so Steve settles on just beating him another half a dozen times while Bucky whines until they realize it's one a.m and well, pool gets boring easily.

Bucky yawns as he thumps the pool stick against the table and Steve realises that he's staring. 

Which, he seems to always be staring. He's acutely aware at the moment that he's staring and he thinks maybe it's a combination of the ebbing and flowing thought of Bucky's face scraping against the fabric top of the pool table as Steve pounds him. And also how mesmerizingly pretty he is, not even just handsome- which he is, definitely handsome, he's just also very, very pretty. 

Steve's known it and thought it a hundred times before but now he's staring when usually he completely avoids that and- it's weird. 

He wonders if it's because they're trapped in together, no need to hide things, just him and Bucky. 

But Steve realizes if he were actually being considerate in the moment he would know that staring and thinking about how pretty someone is when you're stuck in a cabin in bum-fuck egypt with them, is very creepy, he thinks. 

It’s creepy, Steve you're being creepy, his mind supplies, making him tear his eyes away and focus on cleaning up the table so he can get to bed and NOT STARE.

Bucky’s got his hip cocked against the table, looking in Steve's direction with this look that says, I know you're stressing about something, but he doesn't say anything about that. He just thumps his stick a few times and then turns to put his stick back on the rack saying, “Don't worry man, it'll be fun, we’ll make it fun.”

Steve smiles uncontrollably saying the first thing that comes to mind, “Of course, Buck, no such thing as boring when you're around.”

—  
—  
Steve wakes up hungover, head thumping like he got knocked out. It takes a minute or two for the fog of his brain to catch up to reality.

Waking up to a log ceiling is for some reason very unsettling when you almost forget you're in a cabin and used to a city with zero cabins. 

Steve blinks out the burn in his eyes and eventually shuffles to grab his phone. He's on vacation but that doesn't mean he can't lay in bed and play mobile games for a few hours.

—  
There's a knock on the door about thirty minutes later and Steve considers that he may need more sleep since he wonders who in the hell is knocking when it can only reasonably be one person knocking. 

It's clear though when Bucky's voice comes through from the other side of the door. “It feels weird to knock but I'm afraid if I just barge in you'll be fapping.”

Steve belts out a laugh, setting down his phone. “Afraid that you'll like it?” he asks. And, he might be fishing, he doesn't even know.

“I plead the fifth,” Bucky responds as he opens the door. 

“What if I were asleep and your knock woke me up?”

Bucky walks to the bed, sits on the edge and looks at Steve who's still laying down, he rolls his eyes. “Steve, everyone knows you wake up at like eight am on saturday, its eleven, give me a fucking break.”

Steve glares before kicking him with his foot and asking him “What do you want?”

“I just wanted to ask if you'd walk around the woods with me.”

“What if there's a bear? Or bigfoot?” Steve asks. He's not adverse to the wilderness he's just maybe secretly deathly afraid of bigfoot. 

“I'll distract him with my ass while you make a clean getaway.”

“Is it distracting because of how freakishly large it is?” Steve asks. His intention was for that to be an insult but he realizes after its too late that it probably isn't one to Bucky at all.

Bucky grins, “Thick in all the right places.”

Steve has nothing to say besides “I hate you.” 

—  
They do go walk though. After they eat some breakfast they put on a ton of layers and head out.

The snow is still falling some, light enough to see. But Steve actually can see how much snow has fallen. The entire first two steps up to the porch gone under a thick layer of snow. 

There's at least a foot he thinks, watching Bucky as he stumbles over the soft snow, packing it down under his feet. 

Its white everywhere, Bucky’s car borderline buried in it and, for a second he realizes that there's no way Natasha is getting up here, not with how much there is. 

But now isn't the time to stress, he thinks, he can do that later rather than now.

—  
His boots crunch through the snow as he follows Bucky along the frozen bank of a creek, trees surrounding them. The area is still and white, creek nearly solid. Its oddly peaceful despite how freezing his face feels and Steve's not really sure where Bucky’s leading him or why but he doesn't hate it.

Not yet at least. 

“Where are you leading me?” he says with a chuckle. “Are you finally fulfilling your fantasy to murder me in the woods and leave my body to the bigfoots?”

Bucky stops in his tracks, turning in Steve's direction with the most confused look Steve has ever seen on anyone's face in his life “Is it...Bigfoots? Or, bigfeet?” 

“Um,” Steve starts, “I dont...know.”

“Huh,” Bucky says dumbly before going back to the topic at hand. “I actually don't know where we're going.”

And that doesn't sound very good, Steve thinks, the property itself is pretty big and he's pretty sure it just keeps going out into the mountains, no fence or anything.

Steve thinks for a second that maybe they should have both been more aware of what is actually going on, rather than walking mindlessly into a very cold, very wet, more than likely very vast expanse of wilderness. “I would rather not get lost in some woods. I don't want to be found frozen to death with your naked body on top of me.” He turns around as he says it, walking back the way they came. 

Bucky’s feet thud into the snow as he follows Steve from behind. “Why would I be naked?”

“Ya know, hypothermia, you get so cold you feel hot so you get naked.” 

“What about you?” Bucky asks.

Steve turns his neck to look back at him. “Oh I know better.”

“Makes sense.” 

—  
Once they manage their way back to cabin Steve is done with the cold. 

The cabin itself, A large wooden thing, snow clinging across is nice to see. It's probably warm in there, he thinks.

He's used to the cold though, don't get him wrong, he's lived in a very cold place for the entirety of his life and thankfully he's got enough muscle mass to not freeze to death instantly but he's still cold. He turns to look back at Bucky, beginning to tell him that they should go make some food or something. 

He considers to himself too that he should give Nat a call.

But as soon as his head turns he doesn't have time to even react or think or dodge. A ball of snow shoots straight for his face. 

His eyes close on instinct as he feels the cold packed snow hit him dead in the eye, splattering down his face and shoulder 

And...he’s gonna kill him, he thinks instantly. Steve has never been more interested in murdering another human being in his life than he is right now. 

He wipes the snow off of his face slowly, slinging it down off of his hands as Bucky laughs hysterically behind him and all he can really manage to say is “You're such a bitch. I'm gonna kill you.”

Buckys, still belting out laughter but says, “I dare you to, homo.” 

And- Bucky knew before he said that ‘I dare you’ is the last thing anyone says to Steve. 

Steve smirks, pivots, and then without even considering runs at Bucky full force. 

He has enough time to let out an “oh shit,” trying to juke Steve out by stepping to the side to run but Steve's got his arm out, ready to get him down with every bit of muscle memory he has from playing football in high school.

Bucky grunts as Steve's arm catches him, yanking him down to the ground. Steve's determined that if he's getting covered in snow Bucky's going down with him. 

They land, snow still soft, packing down under them and splashing up around them and after a second of processing exactly what he just did Bucky is yelling out an over exaggerated “Jesus fuck, Steve.”

That in itself makes Steve laugh, still laying bodily over Bucky supine in the snow. It's cold. It's very cold. Steve manages to lift himself up, straddling Bucky, holding him down by the biceps. 

“You're gonna start a war, Buck,” he says around a laugh, registering that Bucky's face is bright red, smirking like always as his arms squirm under Steve. 

Steve's mind, completely betraying him supplies that...he's very pretty. God, and Steve's holding him down, over top of him. He could-

No, he internally scolds himself. You do not think about fucking your best friend in the snow. 

“Bite me,” Bucky responds, clearly being a little shit. 

But thats, something Steve could do, he has very little self-control in the moment so he just mumbles “fine,” before bending down and biting into Bucky's cheek. 

Bucky squirms under him again as he tries to wiggle away laughing ridiculously, “Not literally, dumbass.”

Steve sits up again about to attempt to call a truce. He’s pretty sure at this point he's given Bucky plenty enough payback.

But- when he gets another look at Bucky’s face its not exactly what he was expecting. Don't get him wrong it’s not bad it's just- he's red still, probably from the cold but he looks up at Steve slowly, eyes shifting, mouth parted and he's out of breath and Steve feels like he's drowning. Like he can’t pull air into his lungs. 

He's pretty sure if he doesn’t say something right now, anything, he’ll forget the whole reason why he's down here in the first place. “I'll let you go if you don’t throw snow at me.” he can practically feel how breathless he sounds.

“I won’t throw snow at you,” Bucky says, mouth curling into a grin, his eyes gleaming like he’s trying to give Steve his best puppy eyes.

And, Steve physically can’t deny him with that stupid look on his face. “Fine.” he gets up, standing over Bucky with a hand out to help him up. 

Bucky takes it easily, “You wanna go in and eat and watch a movie?” he asks once he's back on his feet. 

Steve says yes thinking it’s probably the best idea Bucky's ever had. 

Until it dawns on him that it could possibly be the worst idea Bucky has ever had.

—  
They cook some soup and manage to thaw out, Steve's fingers feel numb from the cold so it's nice to have the warmth.

They sit at the table, discussing what they'll watch and what their plans tomorrow are. 

“If we don’t make a snowman I'm disowning you,” Bucky says at one point. 

Steve agrees to the snowman easily and agrees to watch die hard because it is after all the greatest christmas movie ever. 

After that he gives Natasha a call. He learns that she's stuck in there too. There isn’t even much discussion to have, just that she’ll have to call to figure out what they're supposed to do with the cabin. 

—  
They get the movie going. Steve settles on the edge of the couch, expecting Bucky to take the other side but instead he plops down dead in the center. 

Steve lifts an eyebrow curiously and looks in his direction. 

There's a grin up on Bucky’s face “I'll be lonely over there?” he says, trying real hard to be a shithead. 

But...at the same time Steve doesn't really mind. It’s an opportunity to be close to him, he thinks. Which really, Steve will take any of those that he can get lately. 

“Fine,” he says, trying his best to sound like he doesn’t really care. But he raises his arm, expecting Bucky to lay in it at least.

Bucky gives him a look, “Is that an invitation?”

“Yep,” Steve responds easily. As soon as Bucky starts leaning into him he tugs him in tighter. His mind the whole time repeatedly attempting to remind him that this is just normal bro things. It's okay, nothing gay about this. 

Even though he can't even kid himself that his reason for it is pretty damn gay. 

Just two gay bros platonically cuddling. That's it.

—  
An hour into the movie and Bucky has managed to pass out completely.

His body is tucked under Steve's armpit, he’s warm, his hand settles over Steve's thigh. 

And- Steve can’t help himself, fingers petting into Bucky’s hair because it's soft and he’s warm and they've never been this close before. 

He's thought about it so many times but it’s just never happened. 

Steve's not gonna let himself waste this opportunity on not petting Bucky’s hair. He would have to be stupid to not do that.

Which reminds him anyway that...maybe he is Stupid. 

His mind falls so easily into everything. The cuddling and the affection, spending every minute with Bucky, teasing him and laughing with him. 

And- they talk a lot, they're together a lot but this feels different and he doesn’t know if that’s just him thinking that or if Bucky does too. He feels foolish even thinking it, but he wishes there was some way he could just keep it going. Some way to just yank Bucky in and love him and tell him how much he wants him.

Maybe the snow won’t melt and they can just do this longer.

Steve thumps his head against the back of the couch and breathes out a sigh. 

—  
Towards the end of the movie Bucky finally wakes up, mouth smacking as he lifts himself up off of Steve and apologizes for drooling on him. 

Steve lets out a chuckle, “It's fine.” 

He thinks to himself that it’s more than fine though. He's pretty sure he would take any opportunity to be near Bucky at this point. “The movie’s over.”

Bucky nods and messes with his hair that’s now strung all over his face, “How long has it been over?” he asks. 

Steve shrugs, “An hour maybe?”

That earns a look from Bucky, eyebrows lifting, “You sat there for an hour with me asleep on your tit?”

Which, in retrospect Steve realizes that might actually be much weirder than he thought. “It's not a big deal,” he says, “you looked comfortable.”

Bucky laughs and shakes his head as he gets up. Not in a bad way though, more like in a happy way. 

So Steve just stretches and gets up with him. 

“I’m gonna shower,” Bucky says softly. 

Steve agrees, “Alright, I guess I’ll call it a night then.”

Pausing, Bucky acts like he's about to say something as he looks at Steve and then looks to the bathroom, clearly contemplating. “It's been nice spending time with you Steve,” he blurts. 

Steve agrees entirely, he more than agrees if he’s honest. But instead he says, “What are you, gay?”

Instantly Bucky grins, arm coming out to playfully punch at Steve's chest. “Only a little.”

“Me too though,” Steve continues. He decides that if he doesn’t leave it’s going to literally get gay, his chest filling with this urge to just spill out how much he cares about Bucky and how special this is and- 

Rather than all that he slaps Bucky's arm and heads for his room, glancing back in Bucky's direction. “So I'll see you in the morning?” he says.

Bucky nods and gives him a soft “Night Steve.”

And, A part of Steve wishes he never woke Bucky up at all. If he hadn't he might have slept through the night in Steve's arms.

—  
Steve lays in bed for a few minutes, contemplating if he can fall asleep at all. Especially with the way his nerves are going crazy thinking about...everything. About Bucky cuddling against him and holding Bucky down in the snow and the way he sounded breathing while Steve was pressed into his back. 

God, Steves heart feels like it’s going to explode out of his chest. 

Before he can second guess it, he's reaching down under the waistband of his pants, into his drawers and grabbing ahold of his dick. He's a romantic, he swears to it, but he's not exactly sure what else to do with the ridiculous feelings that he's having besides beat them out.

So rather than think about how possibly in love he is he thinks about... maybe the pool table, rubbing his face against the felt. Or, maybe the snow, it wouldn't even make sense he thinks but he could have just asked and Bucky might have let him suck him off right there freezing cold in the snow. 

Or, as always his mind drifts to thoughts that he's had a few times before at home. Ones that he keeps to himself as his own secret because he's been thinking about fucking his best friend for years. He's been thinking about it since high school. He's been watching him at the gym and wondering how he would sound and look and-

He strokes his dick heavily, sighing in a mix of confusion and relief as he thinks maybe this will help him get through the week without either losing his mind or taking it too far.

—  
He's only a minute or so in when suddenly, the lights flicker, going a little haywire. That pushes a sigh out of him, instantly shutting off the operation. 

Steve's already barely moving hand comes to a standstill as the lights do it again and before he can register exactly what's going on everything shuts down. The room suddenly going black, tv off, deck light shining through Steve’s window, now suddenly disappearing. 

Before his eyes can adjust there's just blackness and the panic that that sends Steve into is probably the most successful boner killer he’s experienced in his life. Which is, disappointing at best.

He manages to tuck back into his pajamas, sitting up as he hears the terrified shriek of Bucky shouting, “Steve, I need some fucking help please.”

Steve can’t help himself from panting out a laugh, he’s not exactly sure if its out of the humor or the stupidity of the situation but it makes it at least slightly less awful. 

One minute you're jerking off to the thought of your best friend and the next he's screaming for your help.

Sitting up, he blindly reaches to straighten his hair as he gives a half-chortled “Give me a minute. I can’t see anything,” He realizes quickly that this is already top ten in the most awkward experiences of his life. 

Thankfully his sex brain has dissipated so he can focus enough to throw his hand over onto the bedside table to palm for his phone. He feels like he's newly blind, life just hasn’t been the same since the accident. 

His eyes aren’t worth much in the moment though so it feels like he might as well be blind, even with his eyes adjusted, it’s pitch black and their cabin is surrounded by woods with no street lights around. Not to mention the clouds are blocking out the moonlight. 

Thankfully Steve manages to get ahold of his phone, internally sighing in relief that he has at least eighty percent battery so he can use his flashlight long enough to save Bucky from the bathroom. 

When he turns it on it illuminates the room, just bright enough that he can actually see what’s in front of him. He imagines not having the flashlight, having to feel his way through the hall of this cabin, destroying everything in his path. 

For the first time in his life Steve is actually glad that his boner is dead. 

He stands, easily walking down the hall towards the bathroom, and once he gets to the door he knocks lightly just to be polite, “Bucky,” he starts, “You alive in there?”

Bucky’s response comes out weak and trembling, “I’m blind, my dick is out, and it's cold as a motherfucker in here. So no, not really.”

Steve doesn’t want to laugh but it belts out anyway from how dumb this whole situation has become, how dumb this whole week has been. How much he really just wants to finish masturbating. “Do you need help?” he asks.

“Um,” Bucky starts, “Yes, I can’t see. But like I said, my dick is out.”

Steve, although not visible to Bucky behind the shut door shakes his head, thinking to himself that Bucky's dick out if anything would be a blessing right now. “I've seen one sad, small, cold penis, I’ve seen them all, Buck.”

“Okay but,” Bucky babbles, teeth audibly chattering, “I'm cold, it’s the least impressive thing ever.”

Sighing, Steve decides to go ahead and open the door some, his light aimed at the floor so he’s not putting Bucky in a literal spotlight. “As if any version of it is impressive?” 

Bucky shivers, his teeth chattering louder now that the door is open as he mumbles a half-assed, sarcastic, “Excuse you.”

Steve takes that as his opportunity to shine his flashlight directly on Bucky, not to see him, but to see what he’s doing. Also maybe slightly to be a dick.

Once there's enough light to actually see him though, Steve's mind vaguely processes that he's shining a light directly on Bucky's naked body, his dick and his muscles and all. 

For a minute there, Steve had forgotten that he just borderline edged himself. But...now his brain, slightly less in panic decides that this is the most boner inducing thing he’s ever seen.

By no means is Bucky the pinnacle of eroticism right now. His thighs are squeezed together, hands in to cup his dick and balls, with his wet hair dripping down into his face as he shivers and trembles with the expression of someone literally freezing their balls off. 

At the same time though his muscles are all clenched, bunched tight and flexed as he shivers and...his body is nice, Steve already knew his body was nice. He's got good everything, arms, legs, abs. 

The problem is, he's been trying for a long time to keep that thought in a, that dude’s fit way, not a, I would like to fuck that, way. 

But here he is. Failing miserably.

Bucky sighs, shoulders trembling, hair draping over his face as he breathes out a laugh before looking back up at Steve. “Can you get me a towel?” he asks brokenly, too cold to speak. 

Steve shakes his head but still turns to the cabinet to grab one anyway, using his flashlight to guide him. “why didn’t you get one before you showered?”

“I wasn't expecting the power to go out.”

Steve shuts the cabinet, towel in his hands, smirk on his face, “What about clothes?”

There’s a pause, Steve decides to pan his flashlight up at his face. Bucky smiles apologetically, tilting his head, but before he can speak Steve continues. “Were you gonna make a naked beeline to your room?”

Bucky’s smile gets even bigger, “Listen,” he whines, “I thought you would be asleep so I just didn’t worry about it.”

“And now here you are, freezing, no clothes in sight,” Steve teases.

Bucky’s hand shoots out quickly, grabbing for the towel in Steve’s hand, his shoulders trembling. Steve can’t deny that it’s both amusing and adorable to watch him. “Can you please just give me the towel so my hair can stop getting me even more wet,” Bucky asks.

Handing the towel over to him, Steve shines the light on him again, but this time he thinks to cover his eyes with his spare hand. He’ll do whatever he can to avoid feeling like a creep at this point.

Not to mention, he’s pretty sure if he did get another look in Buckys direction he wouldn’t be able to stop.

To distract himself, Steve comes up with a plan. “How about you stay put for a minute,” he says thoughtfully. “I’ll go light some candles and start a fire so I don’t drain my battery.”

Bucky just nods as his teeth chatter, wrapped in the towel. 

—  
Getting to work quickly, Steve lights up a roll of paper to toss into the fireplace, throwing a few more in to get the fire burning. The candles were easy to light but the fire less so. 

By the time he’s done Bucky comes padding into the living area on his own, still shaking as he says, “I saw the light so I came...I’m cold.”

Steve feels a sympathetic smile come up, seeing Bucky shivering in the hall in nothing but a towel makes him get this urge to just go up and grab him, rub his palms down Bucky's arms and warm him up the best he can.

But that's the last thing he should do, he thinks. That's probably the last thing Bucky would want.

“Here,” he starts instead, walking to the couch just a few feet in front of the fire to move some blankets aside “Lay down and I’ll get you some clothes.”

—  
When he gets back, Bucky is sitting, his whole body rolled up as he shivers hard, still in nothing but his towel. Steve tosses his clothes down on the couch beside him hurriedly and looks away, remembering that the last thing he needs is to be a perv right now. “I just got some clothes that I thought would be warm,” he admits.

“Thanks,” Bucky responds fondly, fabric ruffling as he throws the pajamas on. “You didn't get me underwear,” he laughs. 

Which, Steve realizes that he didn't, not on purpose he was just in a rush, “I’m sorry.”

“It's cool I’m fine with freeballing anyway,” Bucky responds. Steve finally turns, figuring that he's more than likely clothed now, which turns out to be true.

“are you tom petty?” Steve asks stupidly, sitting on the couch by a now clothed Bucky. 

“Wrong lyrics Steve.”

—  
It stays dark, Steve's pretty sure that it probably will for quite a while so he preoccupies himself by closing his eyes, his neck dropped onto the back of the couch lazily. The fire burns ahead of them and it's decently warm which keeps him comfortable. Bucky's curled up in a ball on the other side of the couch but his eyes are open, so Steve tries his hardest not to stare at him.

He focuses instead on closing his eyes, hoping the lights might just miraculously flicker on, but before he knows it he's drifting off.

—  
He's not exactly sure how long he sleeps for, but when he wakes up it’s dark and freezing. He lifts his head groggily, scanning the room. The fire is still burning, but just barely, and all but two candles have burnt out. Beside him, leaned against his arm Bucky has moved towards him for warmth, but that also clearly must have been unsuccessful since he slowly opens his eyes, looking up at Steve as he shivers. 

Steve registers that he needs to get up, get the fire burning again. So he starts wriggling away before suddenly Bucky's gripping his bicep tight. “Jesus it's fuckin’ cold,” he mumbles to Steve, lifting himself away quickly.

Steve wishes there was something he could do, some way to get the power on or something. But he knows even if there is a backup generator he couldn't even try to get that set up tonight, not with how cold it is. “Lay down,” he says, “I'm gonna get the fire burning again.”

Bucky doesn't dispute it but stays sat up, watching Steve as he grabs another few cords of firewood out of the log rack to throw in. The fire is still there, just enough that the logs get it burning again, ashes dusting up. Steve grabs the poker and stirs it around some, hoping that’s enough to keep it going. At least for another few hours. It’s been at least ten years since he was a boy scout, so he doesn't quite trust his fire-maintaining skills

—  
Once the flames are curling up, warming the room some, he turns back to the couch, looking at Bucky's who's still clenching himself inward from the cold. “Use a blanket,” he says, grabbing for the stack of them at the end of the couch. 

Bucky gives him a soft smile, barely illuminated by firelight as he grabs it from Steve’s offering hand, giving a light, “Thanks.” 

Steve's not sure what to do, assuming that he can probably take the other end of the couch or something. Maybe he can just sleep in the chair, he'd much rather give Bucky the majority of the couch to be comfortable.

Until Bucky clears his throat, pausing before he speaks, “Hey Steve,” his voice still a little groggy.

Steve’s got another blanket, unfolding it to use for himself but he looks in Bucky's direction anyway. “Yeah?” It’s dark, but just bright enough to see him.

“I know this is weird, you can say no but...Since it’s cold do you wanna maybe lay with me?” Bucky's not usually shy, not at all really, he’s the epitome of charisma, but he sounds half-asleep and small and that manages to get Steve wanting to take care of him even more. 

Steve looks over at the other side of the couch where he intended to lay, trying not to take Bucky's question as too much, the last thing he wants is to be is an idiot right now, “I was just gonna lay at the end over here.”

“Yeah but,” Bucky says calmly, his shoulders shrugging as he works up a persuasive grin “C'mon man, don't make me ask you to cuddle.” he lets out a laugh that sounds nervous, but like it wasnt really intended to be, messing with the seam of the folded up quilt.

And, Steve’s mind says yes so quick that he has to try not to be blatantly excited, like some dog finally allowed to jump on the couch. He doesn't say anything to start though, just nods his head easily as he hands his blanket over to Bucky. “Yeah, Buck, that's probably smart.”

Bucky nods his head too as Steve continues, his hand waving upward, “Get up,” Steve suggests, quickly sitting himself down onto the couch, “you can lay on the outside.”

Bucky manages to smirk, shaking his head, “Maybe I wanted to be big spoon.”

“Too bad,” Steve snarks, nudging Bucky's shoulder until he finally gives in and stands. 

Taking the opportunity, Steve moves so he can lay his himself down on his side on the couch, pulling a pillow under his head as he brings his legs up too. He lets the arm under him dangle out so Bucky can lay on it, “Climb in.”

But above him Bucky just gives him this look, this grin that turns into a exhaled laugh as he shakes his head even heavier than before. “Steve,” he starts, “You're taking up the whole couch.”

Steve lets himself look down, noticing that there’s only a few inches of space between him and the edge of the couch, which he hadn’t really considered. 

In an attempt to make space he nudges back some more, until his back is squished against the inside of the couch. 

But still, there really is only a small amount of space, enough for someone to possibly fit but definitely not someone that’s almost a big as Steve is. And Bucky is someone that's almost as big as Steve is.

“Oh,” Steve mutters.

“Yeah, you're a big boy Steve.”

Steve sits up, scanning the room, wishing the power wasn’t out so they could just go cuddle in his room, lay in bed with enough space. He wonders if that would be possible now.

But the cold would probably be hell in there he thinks. “Okay then,” he says, “We could just lay on the floor? Lay some blankets down or something? It'll be warmer anyway.”

“Only if it doesn't feel like I’m laying on a hard floor,” Bucky requests.

And, okay yeah, Steve used to sleep on the floor a ton, there's already a big area rug anyway so he considers that if he just stacks up a few blankets and throws down some pillows it won't be too bad. Steve uselessly points towards the hallway as he thinks, saying, “Yes, just...wait right there.”

—  
When he comes back he’s got his arms full of blankets and pillows, stacked up from both of their rooms and he tosses them down on the couch. 

“First off, it's cold as hell in there,” he says, “And second I think I can craft a nest to lay on to keep us warm.” Steve smiles like he's proud of himself. 

But all that gets out of Bucky is, “As far as i knew, hell isn’t usually described as cold.”

—  
He sets down the blankets, one at a time, 3 comforters stacked, some pillows, another 2 quilts, and a few throw blankets. It’s far enough from the fire that they probably aren't at risk to accidentally throw one in and catch the place on fire. 

Steve hopes so at least.

Looking down at his work it doesn’t look too bad, it’s very...fluffy.

Bucky doesn’t even wait for Steve to say he's done, flopping himself to his knees and then diving face first onto the makeshift floor bed, his face squishing heavily into a pillow. 

“So?” Steve asks.

“Not too bad,” Bucky mumbles, lifting his head free from the pillow to speak. He grins before continuing, “Try it out for yourself.” his hand comes down, slapping the outside space, signaling where Steve should lay.

And, Steve really has no argument, lowering himself until he’s down on the blankets, wedging the blankets that were intended to go over them out from under Bucky’s heavy ass. 

Bucky lifts himself to allow it though, eventually rolling onto his back once the blankets are freed.

Steve cant keep himself from smiling at that, “You comfortable?” he asks, allowing himself to lay down in the space next to Bucky, yanking the few blankets up over them as he settles in.

And, it isn’t too bad, he thinks, it’s actually pretty damn comfortable if Steve says so himself. 

Bucky doesn’t respond, just lets out a huff as he turns himself over to his side, now facing the fire. 

Steve, honestly wants to just roll over too and grab him, pull him close. But he also doesn’t want to assume that he could do that. Bucky did ask to cuddle but...he’s not even sure if it would be too forward for him to initiate it. He lays there on his back instead, rubbing his hands. 

But Bucky must sense that, he contorts his neck back to look at Steve.

Steve just glances towards him, waiting for permission. 

That gets Bucky shaking his head, and before Steve knows it, Bucky’s hand is grabbing for his, the one opposite of him, Bucky stretches, grabbing Steve's wrist as he slowly lifts it in his direction, trying to pull Steve towards him. 

Taking the hint, Steve lets himself roll onto his side, his chest already against the curve of Bucky's back and he sets his hand on Bucky's hip, just setting it there, trying not to grab. 

That, however, sets in the realization that despite how much he wanted this, he never took into account the restraint that it would take him.

It’s gonna be a long night.

—  
It stays quiet in the cabin, only the crackling of the fire, wind sweeping past the windows outside, strong enough that Steve can hear the waving of trees and whistling against the windows, but still not enough to provide much noise. 

Steve can hear Bucky breathing softly in front of him, his right arm tucked under Bucky’s neck in front of his pillow and his left hand still against Bucky’s hip. 

He assumes that Bucky’s asleep, trying not to disturb him, but the longer he lays against him, the more he's reminded of what exactly is going on. 

Bucky's his best friend, Steve knows it's just for warmth, it's just platonic, there's nothing big about it. 

But...Bucky's so tight against him, the curve of his back tucked tight against Steve's front, his ass against Steve's dick and his hand setting over Steve's arm. 

And god, Steve's always had good self-control but this is proving to be difficult. 

Bucky stirs some, moving so he can free his arm from the blanket and in the process Steve pulls his hand away, placing it back when Bucky is settled. 

This time though, his hand ends up against Bucky’s bare skin, his fingertips settling against Bucky's hipbone. And his brain, betraying him, imagines grabbing there, holding him there, pulling him towards him by the hips.. 

Doing the best he can, Steve breathes out a sigh, allowing himself to move his hand like maybe that'll stop the want to pull Bucky in from even happening. 

Bucky's skin is soft beneath his palm, just the curve of his hip, and Steve feels himself rubbing his hand over it, moving his fingers back and forth against the stretch of skin open in the gap between his shirt and his pants. 

His hand comes to a stop as soon as Bucky moves again, adjusting himself lightly. But Bucky's hand against the arm under his neck squeezes tighter, bodily tensing. 

And god, for a moment Steve feels like a creep, he pulls his hand away like he just stuck it in fire, whispering a barely audible “Sorry,” assuming that he's probably destroyed everything, made it awkward for both of them.

But Bucky actually responds, his voice awake yet soft, “No, it's-” he starts, “You can keep doing it, it's okay.”

Steve feels his heart kind of pick up, his chest full as he nods against Bucky’s hair like Bucky can see it or feel it or something as he lifts his hand back where it was. 

This time he lets his fingertips dip under Bucky’s shirt, feeling higher up against his hip and he rubs that like he did before, smoothing his hand up the soft skin of Bucky’s ribs. 

Bucky's breath picks up, Steve can hear it and, god, he can't read Bucky's mind so he doesn’t want to assume anything but he thinks maybe he wants this, maybe Steve can touch him further too, like across his stomach, over his ribs, and up his chest maybe. Feel the warmth of his skin against his fingers. 

Steve keeps his hand just where it is though, with the way Bucky’s laying his hip curves some, so Steve runs his hand up and down that, moving his shirt as he goes. 

Bucky lets out a pant after a few minutes, wiggling, and, before that Steve's dick was doing a good job at staying put. 

But suddenly, he becomes acutely aware of everything, his hand over Bucky's ribcage, arm under his neck, dick pressed tight against the swell of his ass and, the movement didn’t help. 

Steve breathes out roughly, grabbing Bucky’s side to pull him in as he almost uncontrollably drags his dick up, hoping to get even deeper against Bucky’s ass. Wishing he could just bury it in him already. 

That thought though gets Steve pulling away again, his hand staying put, but his hips sliding back nervously so he isn’t trying to fuck himself against his best friends ass like the pervert that he currently feels like.

Because no matter how bad he wants to, even with those thoughts shuffling through his head of burying his dick in him, the fact that he's completely aware that it’s Bucky, yet still wanting it. He can't just fuck his friend, he can't just-

“You don’t have to stop,” Bucky pants, Steve can hear the smirk in his voice though. His arm reaches back again, just like before, but instead of Steve’s arm he’s pulling in, it’s Steve's hip, trying to get Steve's dick back up against his ass like he wants it there. 

But this time he’s actually looking back at Steve, his neck twisted to look in Steve's direction and the room is dim, only shadowed firelight, but Bucky's eyes look heavy, his tongue coming out to lick at his lips, pupils big.

Steve's pretty sure he's never been so sure of a fuck me look in his life.

He can’t even think rationally, he doesn't even dispute it, he moves in, using a harsh grip to pull Bucky's ass back against him hard, pressing his face against Bucky’s temple as his palm moves inward, grabbing at Bucky's stomach now. 

He slides his palm over the muscles there, all the curves and planes of it, grabbing in at his skin there as he grinds his dick against the soft swell of his ass. 

Bucky full on groans, his eyes shut, still licking at his lips as his hand lets go of Steve’s hip, it comes up instead to stretch and pet at Steve's hair behind him. “Can you kiss me?” he asks, barely whispered. 

Steve doesn’t even respond, just lifts his neck. Bucky’s eyes snap open, hazy, and, Steve wants to look at them, wants to see how his pupils get big as he touches him. He lets the hand on Bucky’s stomach slide down further, over the waistband of his pants and as soon as he feels the bulge of Bucky’s cock he leans in and finally kisses him. 

His hand kneads in heavily, grabbing at Bucky's cock from over his pants to feel how hard he his, how its curved up towards his stomach, how bad he needs it. That lets him kiss a sigh right out of Bucky's mouth, makes Bucky buck his hips into his hand and bite into the kiss and tilt his ass back against Steve's own cock like he’s chasing down everything he can get out of Steve.

It’s, overwhelming, Steve can’t think of anything but tearing Bucky's pants off of him. 

Instead Steve settles on just allowing his fingers to slide down into the waistband of Bucky's pajamas.

Bucky keens against him as Steve finally touches his bare skin again, feeling over the shaved stubble over his cock, over the jut of his hip bone, his cock thick above his hand. It’s warm and soft and Steve feels his own dick throb knowing who he’s about to touch.

Bucky breaks the kiss, panting as his hips curl, trying to get Steve on him, his eyes open, desperate.

That pushes another sound out of Steve, a growl, saying breathlessly, “God,” as he finally brings his hand around to wrap his palm around Bucky's bare dick loosely from under his pants. He's never seen Bucky naked, not fully, but he knows just by touch right now that Bucky's dick is nice, god, it's thick and hard in his hand, his grip tight around it and he just wants to touch him like this forever, hear the breathless sounds Bucky makes against his mouth, kiss them away.

He can’t focus, can't multitask right now, but he still drags his dick up against Bucky’s ass, wishing that it could be his bare skin. 

He slowly allows himself to let go of Bucky's cock, moving quickly, taking the opportunity to throw the blankets mostly off, dragging it right down to their thighs so he can see what he's doing. Using the back of his hand to pull Bucky's waistband down some so he can get back to touching him again. It’s warm enough from the fire that Steve would rather be able to see what he's doing than have a blanket.

Bucky gets the message quick, his own arm coming down to slide under the blanket so he can awkwardly yet efficiently get his pajamas tucked below his ass, much better than Steve could, lifting and moving until it’s down low before he settles his arm back onto Steve's hip behind him again.

Steve pulls his hand out from under Bucky’s neck, using his elbow to sit his body up so he can watch from above as he grinds his hips in again, flexing his ass. Instead of reaching back around Bucky though, this time he gets his hand on his ass, squeezing into his flesh as he slides his dick up against it. 

Bucky looks back at him with a smirk, Steve manages to catch it between looking down at the barely visible in the dark, spread of his ass, and the look on his face, and he feels like he can barely even speak, “Do you want me to kiss you again?” Steve asks brokenly, thinking maybe that's why Bucky’s looking at him like he is. His voice coming out weaker than he expects. 

Bucky doesn't sound much better though, his smirk still up, but his eyes look hazed, “You can do whatever you want,” he says.

And that's- somehow, to his sex brain the hottest thing Steve's heard in his life.

He doesn't respond, just tightens his hold on Bucky’s ass, moving his palm so he can grip it enough to lift it, spreading his ass apart enough to slide his dick up in between his cheeks, dragging against his hole.

It's warm and tight and nothing like being in there but its so fucking close. Steve groans as he tries to slide his dick up, realizing for a split second that he's got his dick the closest to being in his best friend’s ass that he could be without actually being in his best friend’s ass. 

Ahead of him Bucky breathes out heavily, letting go of Steve’s hip to bring his hand ahead of himself, grabbing onto his own dick desperately. 

Vaguely Steve considers that he should be doing that, that he wants to get Bucky off, that he wants to give him anything he can. “Do you like getting fucked?” he asks, hoping that the answer is yes even though if its not he's perfectly content with what he’s doing. 

But Bucky's answer is more than a yes, his arm moving quick to stroke at his dick as he nods, breathless, saying, “God yeah,” like that's exactly what he was hoping for. 

Steve figures it’s obvious with his initial question but he continues anyway, “Can I fuck you?”

Before he can register what's going on, Bucky pulls away, leaning himself upward as he says quickly, “Wait stop.”

Steve, on instinct bodily comes to a stand still, half of his dick still tucked against Bucky's asshole as he does exactly what he’s told, stopping instantly. It takes a split second for everything to catch up, what exactly he’s doing, what he’s about to do. And, of course he wouldn't want that you idiot, he thinks to himself. You've pushed it too far you ruined-

But Bucky starts lifting himself, continuing as he stands, his hand out, “Ah, shit,” he mumbles, “Yes, the answer is yes, but- let me go actually go get-” his voice sounds frantic, hurried. “Yes, jesus, I want you to fuck me, my dick is fucking hard.” 

Steve lets himself scan Bucky's body, seeing that his dick is in fact, very hard. 

Bucky goes on, “But I- I brought lube.” 

And...for some reason, Steve didn’t expect that, he doesn't know why he didn't but he didn’t and that pushes a laugh out of him. “You brought lube to the cabin?” 

“Yes,” Bucky admits, “I'm a slut I bring lube everywhere.”

Steve belts out a laugh, “Who were you planning on fucking in the middle of nowhere? A bear?”

Bucky smirks again, shoulders shrugging, “I've had a few bears in my life, I'm down to fuck bears.” 

Shaking his head, Steve waves his arm in the direction of the hall, “Go get your lube.”

—  
When Bucky gets back he has the lube in hand and a condom, to Steve's surprise it’s just a small little bottle of lube, “I was expecting you to roll in a drum, not that,” Steve says.

Bucky throws the lube and condom down onto Steve, still standing above him as he sighs, “I’d love a drum of lube, get me one for christmas.”

“Christmas was last month and I bought you a hoodie.”

“Which I loved,” Bucky says quickly, pulling his clothes off like it's no big deal at all “Fine then, for my birthday, buy me a drum of lube.”

Steve shakes his head, laughing as he tugs at Bucky's wrist impatiently, mumbling, “Get down here already, now isn’t the time to fuck around.”

Bucky does as he’s told but with it he smirks and adds, “Or is it?”

—  
Bucky ends up over Steve, sitting in his lap as Steve lays back after lazily undressing himself too. Steve's got both of his hands occupied, wrapped around each of their dicks, laying back so Bucky can kiss him. Bucky holds himself up with one hand, the other stretched behind him to finger his ass and, the noises he makes gets Steve wanting to fuck up into him right then, just move his hand out of the way and take over. 

But if anything, this a practice in patience and Steve is very patient. 

He lets go of their dicks, deciding to feel around some, running his hands down Bucky's chest, over his nipples, down his ribs and eventually down to his thighs. 

Bucky's straddled over him, pressed against him but it makes it easy to reach his hands around to Bucky’s ass. He lets his fingers dig deep into his flesh, spreading his ass.

“Fuck,” Bucky breaks their kiss to mumble uselessly. Still moving back onto his fingers. 

That gets Steve kissing harder, biting into the bottom of Bucky's lip as he kneads his ass apart, wanting to just slip right in. “hurry the hell up,” he says impatiently, trying to sound playful until he realizes that he just sounds desperate. 

Bucky smirks against his mouth, kissing him another time for good measure before he responds, “Oh, you want it?” 

Steve wants to act like he's all dominant, like hes in charge and he'll take what he wants but he can’t even attempt to do that, his body deciding to just squeeze into Bucky’s ass more like that'll get him fucking in sooner, nodding his head as he lets out a weak, “God yeah.”

Bucky grinds against him, their dicks together as he intentionally presses himself stomach to stomach against Steve kissing him so hard that Steve feels like it possesses him. 

But it doesn't last long, all Bucky does is pull away to smirk again, knowing exactly what he's doing. “Yeah,” he sighs, his hand pulling away from behind him to settle on the opposite side of Steve's head. “Get it then.”

Steve doesn’t quite realize how tense he is until that, relaxing his head onto the pillow because the idea alone of what he's about to do makes his eyes wanna roll back, muscles clenching.

All that’s on his mind is fucking the life out of Bucky, completely destroying him. 

So he lets himself focus on the task, lifting his neck again to see what he's doing. 

Bucky's sat on him, hovering over him and he makes things easier by lifting his hips up, quickly rising himself up with a hand on Steve's chest and the other getting his dick and his balls out of the way.

Steve isn't about to waste any time though, reaching for his cock with one hand and the lube and condom with the other, he covers it efficiently, stroking the lube in, and starts tilting it back between Bucky's legs, past his balls, right against his hole.

And- Steve’s ready to curl his hips up, to fuck in, but before he really gets the chance, Bucky starts sitting down, easily taking Steve's dick in one try.

Dropping his head, Steve tugs his hand free, letting Bucky take over settling his palms on Bucky’s hips instead. 

—  
Bucky pants as he moves, fucking himself in Steve's lap and Steve never even let himself consider that his friend might actually ride his dick one day, but here he is, riding it well. It doesn’t even feel real, Steve's mind taken over by it all.

He grips his fingertips into Bucky's hips, just above his ass, squeezing in as Bucky bounces on his dick. 

His eyes are open, fuck dumb as he scans Steve's body, one hand rubbing over Steves pecs and the other just dangling. He flexes his thighs hard, rising and falling, dick slapping against Steve's stomach a little. 

God, he's beautiful, Steve's mind supplies. Like, just, so unbelievably perfect. And it's not the first time Steves thought that, he thinks that all the time, he thinks that a lot. But, this is different, he's got this sweat on his chest, rolling down. His abs are tensed with his whole body. His mouth stays barely open and Steve has considered so many times what he might look like when he's getting fucked. 

But, this is so much more than what he ever could have thought it would be. He looks perfect when he's getting fucked and Steve wants to just fuck him forever, every chance he gets.

“Fuck,” Steve sighs because he can't help it. 

It takes Bucky a second to catch up, dick dumb as he looks up at Steve and his mouth curls into a grin, “You like that?” he asks, his voice is scratchy.

Steve's not sure why but that gets him really fucking his hips up, curling them to pack up into Bucky's ass, watching as his mouth opens a little more, eyes shutting as he gives up on the whole control thing and let's Steve start fucking him hard. 

Steve doesn't even respond to what he said, just grabs on to him and fucks him the best he can manage. 

A solid five minutes of quickly thrusting up pushes Steve close so quick that he almost doesn’t have time to even sense it. When he does though his instinct is to grab Bucky by the hips and pull out. 

Bucky drops his head, breathing out heavily, fucked loose. So it's nothing for Steve nudge him by the hip onto his back. 

At this point they're already over the blankets, already sweaty from body heat and the fire and Steve doesn’t even care about the power being out or the blizzard or anything going on. His focus is just on getting Bucky back on his dick. 

Quickly he lifts himself to his knees and crawls between Bucky's legs, using one hand to lift his leg by the underside of his knee as he uses the other to push his dick back in.

Bucky's eyes are shut but he's completely in fuck brain, overwhelmed to the point that Steve shoving back into him gets his mouth falling open, hand grabbing at his hair ridiculously. 

The sight of that alone is fucking breathtaking to Steve's fucked up brain.

He thinks about what he's doing, how he’s got Bucky utterly wrecked just by getting his dick in his ass and he wonders about all the things he could do to get him reacting some more. 

On that thought, Steve grabs ahold of Bucky's dick, squeezing it tight in rhythm with his thrusts to jerk him off. Bucky's so loose below him, completely gone, taking everything Steve can give him and it's the single most beautiful thing Steve's ever seen. The way his eyes flicker and he grunts out these weak sounds and his dick drips as Steve strokes at it. 

And- Steve doesn’t want it to end but he also wants to come so bad that it's killing him. “I-” he mumbles uselessly, “I'm gonna come.”

He expects Bucky to smirk again, to do something that intentionally makes him look fuckable but instead he just looks up at Steve, eyes glassy, mouth open, too fucked up to do much but lay there and take it, and a split second later he’s tensing, arching up into Steve's hand as he groans, and then shivers as he comes. 

His stomach gets covered in it and Steve strokes him through it until he's done. He's tense around Steve's dick, tight and hot and Steve fucks in hard a few times before he comes too, shooting off in the condom as he slumps back and pulls out. 

—  
Bucky just lays there, arm over his eyes, too gone to care, which Steve realizes is both hilarious and relatable since he's just been braced back on his hand, still between Bucky’s legs, trying to breathe for the past few minutes. 

It takes him a considerable amount of effort to not just lay there in his own nut, but after a few breaths he finally manages, tugging the condom off to throw it away in the kitchen.

When he gets back Bucky's exactly where he left him, laid out on top of the blankets with his knees up and spread out.

Steve's got a wad of paper towels from the kitchen and he drops down to lazily wipe Bucky's come off of his stomach. It's enough to get the majority of it, so he's not exactly thorough about it, but Bucky still smiles at him, eyes still covered, saying “Thanks.” His voice is broken, tired sounding and Steve's mind quickly registers that that's what Bucky sounds like after he gets fucked.

His arm moves away from his eyes and he looks up at Steve before continuing, “Can we cuddle again?”

Steve throws his shirt on and hands Bucky his own wad of clothes, responding with, “Of course.” 

—  
When he wakes up the power must be back on, the fire is burnt out but the ceiling fan spins and the room feels warm again.

Steve opens his eyes, registering that he fell asleep halfway on top of Bucky and ended up being held by him. Bucky's arm is still wrapped around his neck tightly. 

And, he's entirely aware of the fact that they boned last night, he can’t even try to pretend like they didn't. In fact, his brain will not stop remembering that they fucked.

But he doesn’t want to make shit awkward, and his stiffie poking Bucky’s hip probably isn't helping. 

The thought of it is weird anyway though. It's almost like it might have been a dream, because, it was such a spur of the moment thing and really nothing like that was supposed to happen between them.

Too late now though, he thinks.

God, he needs to get up, he needs to do something rather than dwell on what in the hell is going on.

Slowly he lifts Bucky's arm, sliding out of his hold and quietly lifting himself to his feet so he can walk to the bathroom to piss and fix his morning wood issue.

The whole time he does he gets flashbacks to last night, memories of Bucky coming and Bucky moaning and Bucky's ass around his dick and it feels a little bit like that’s all he'll ever think of again. Which, if he’s honest that sounds like both a blessing and a curse.

To distract himself some, he decides to cook some breakfast, hoping that everything in the fridge isn’t bad. 

It looks pretty normal when he opens it up, Figuring that the cold probably helped. But he knows already that he's not even gonna attempt to cook the bacon. 

Instead he pulls out a carton of eggs and grabs some bread off the counter.

—  
Bucky's still asleep but Steve cooks him up some eggs anyway, frying them in a skillet while toast sits in the toaster. 

He wonders exactly how stupid it would be to mention last night. Assuming to himself that the answer is very.

But at the same time he feels a little like it’s something that, if left alone, could either kill their friendship, or potentially leave him sexually frustrated every time that he looks in Bucky’s direction from now on. 

Both of which Steve would love to avoid.

His mind slips in and out of flashbacks of the look on Bucky's face as Steve was fucking into him, the way he looked bouncing on Steve’s cock and-

Steve realizes that he's never really been this obsessive over a single fuck in his entire life.

In a way he thinks, I’ve done hookups before- what's another one. But...His mind being the betraying bastard that it is most definitely doesn’t think that was a hookup. 

He's pretty sure he can't just no homo his way out of this. 

That thought conjures up more images of kissing Bucky, the way his teeth dug into Steve's lip. The look in his eyes as Steve stared into them. How warm it felt to lay his head on Bucky’s chest. 

And, he’s pretty sure there's nothing he can do to make it less than it was. 

In an attempt to distract himself he pulls a slice of toast out of toaster and eats it as he cooks.

—  
To be nice, Steve brings Bucky’s breakfast to him. 

He considers for a moment that doing romantic shit like this is probably the last thing that he should be doing for someone that he’s currently wanting to both viciously fuck and love at the same time. 

But, Steve's weak.

He sets the plate in front of Bucky’s head and thumps him in the stomach with the foot. “Wake up turd, there’s food.”

Bucky groans, eyes opening and staring ahead of him like he's gone brain dead as he slowly drags his eyes up to Steve. “No.” he says quickly. 

“Yes,” Steve responds easily. “Eat the eggs, I worked hard on those.”

Bucky yawns hard, mouth opening wide. Steve tries not to let himself yawn too as he watches Bucky flop onto his back. “Fine,” Bucky says grumpily. 

Steve feels himself grin because it’s cute and...dammit, he knows he shouldn’t be thinking like that. But then he considers that he would have to have some serious issues if he didn’t think Bucky was cute. 

Bucky flops over onto his side and lays his head against his bicep, picking up the fork to cut out a piece of egg. 

“Good?” Steve asks like an idiot from above Bucky, watching him chew. 

“It tastes like egg.”

“Now you can never say I’m not a good friend, I gave you dick and breakfast in bed.” Steve smirks because it's true, considering that maybe that’s the least tactful way to bring up the fuck that you had with the person you fucked. But, Steve has always been good at making bad decisions. 

Bucky rolls his eyes. 

And that, Steve determines, is his cue to shut up about it. He breathes out a laugh in attempt to play it off and walks back into the kitchen so he can beat himself up for saying anything. 

Don't make it awkward, Steve. Don't. Make. It. Awkward.

—  
Steve ends up grabbing Bucky’s plate, throwing it in the sink for him and slinking off to his room so he can avoid Bucky like he's pretty sure Bucky would want. 

He warns him at least. Says the cold got to him some, his throat is sore so he's going to go lay in bed for awhile. 

Bucky gives him a soft smile and says, “sure Steve, I'll probably do the same.”

So Steve lays in bed on his phone and scrolls through facebook, ignoring the feeling of dread that lingers in the back of his mind. 

—  
“Power went out last night,” he says to Nat over the phone. 

She huffs and Steve can almost promise she's shaking her head. “It’s ridiculous. The snow hasn’t stopped. I'm not sure if it’s even worth going that way, maybe we can get it refunded.”

“If not, I’m sure Bucky and I could handle it,” he offers. Which, it wasn't cheap but it only seems fair. 

“Speaking of,” Natasha cuts back in, “How are you two getting along?”

Steve mentally sends himself a reminder to absolutely not even suggest that anything has happened between them. “It's been fine,” he says calmly. “We've just been hanging out.”

Natashas voice has a teasing tone to it, asking “Did you both cuddle for warmth?”

Instantly Steve feels his ears get warm, repressing the urge to say oh god, because he's not a good liar, and Natasha knows it. He doesn't even know what to say that won't almost be a flat out yes. Or, knowing him, completely give away that it was even more. “I'm not answering that,” he ends up saying, bracing himself for the eternal shit he knows he's going to get. 

Natasha belts out a laugh, faking a gasp. “You did, you two cuddled,” She laughs ridiculously. 

Steve knows if he doesn't say something, everyone will know and he's not about to get himself in deeper shit. “Please don’t tell anyone. Especially him,” Steve borderline begs.

“I won't,” Nat says, “on one condition.”

“Oh god.”

“Did you fuck?” Her tone is so serious, accusatory, and Steve feels the life get sucked out of him.

All he can manage to say again is, “oh god.”

And- he knows he isn’t making things easier on himself.

“Wow,” she says, sounding genuinely surprised, “I didn't think it was that bad between you.”

“That bad?” Steve asks, as if it were any degree of bad before last night. Even though...he’s had thoughts and some feelings but- it wasn't bad. 

He swallows nervously, trying not to think about it too much because if he does he's pretty sure he'll have some revelations that he isn’t ready for. 

“I mean I knew you two were close to admitting your romantic feelings, but you cant even keep it in your pants.” She laughs like it’s hilarious but to Steve it’s really kind of not.

“It wasn’t- it's not like that- there's no feelings and, it just- it just happened.”

“No feelings?” Natasha asks deadpan. “I know you're both in love so the only no feelings are the ones you're lying about Steve.”

Steve sighs, wishing that it were the both of them rather than him hopelessly in love. “Well I do, yeah, but I’m not gonna bother Bucky with that nat, thats-”

“Steve,” Natasha interrupts. “You can be dense sometimes.”

Steve doesn't think he's dense. Usually he doesn’t at least, but he doesn't dispute it, just sighs out an “I know.”

“So don’t be, Bucky loves you, I'm sure he initiated it, don’t lie. He's just doing the same dense shit you're doing.”

In retrospect, Steve considers that maybe she’s right though. Bucky’s the epitome of charisma at least sixty percent of the time, but the other forty he can be an awkward, nervous wreck. 

Most people don’t see that side of him, but Steve definitely does. 

Natasha continues, “I have to go, but I expect you to stop being an idiot while I’m gone.”

“Fine,” Steve agrees easily. “Just, don’t say anything to him about it.”

“Just promise me when you both figure out what in the hell you're doing you don't get some hilarious sex injury. We can’t get an ambulance out there to you.”

—  
Steve spends a few hours just laying in bed. It’s warm under his blankets and easy to fall in and out of sleep. For now, avoiding the inevitable talk that he and Bucky need to have. 

But it doesn’t last long, shortly towards the afternoon there’s a knock on the door, Bucky coming into the room slowly. His head just leans through the gap between the door and the jamb like he’s afraid to intrude. 

Steve lifts the blanket off of himself slowly, “Yeah?” he asks.

“Do you wanna help me get some wood in case the power goes out again,” Bucky asks. There’s an odd kind of cautiousness to his voice that Steve notices. He knows already that it's probably related to last night. 

For a split second Steve wants to blame himself, thinking that maybe he made a mistake until he realizes that Bucky’s coming to him afraid, not because of something Steve's done but probably because he’s thinking just like Steve that he's the one that ruined this, that he's the one that made it all awkward.

Steve figures that’s a sign enough that they need to figure this out, deciding to mention that after they're done collecting the wood. 

“Yeah,” Steve says, “Sure let me get dressed.”

—  
Bucky hands an already cut log to Steve quickly, dusting the snow off of it before stacking one and then two in his arms. He shivers and rubs his gloved hands together in between. 

Steve can’t help but smile at him. God, he knows it’s tense between them with everything going on, but...he’s perfect. He's always been perfect. Steve's never thought anything was so perfect in his life. But now he can’t resist the urge to pull him in and keep him warm. He watches as Bucky grunts while lifting log and that pushes a betraying chuckle out of Steve. 

Bucky looks in his direction quickly, and Steve tries to turn away, to not smile so much so he doesn’t look like a creep. 

Now isn’t the time, he thinks to himself. They have a lot to discuss, but not now, not when they're getting wood for the fire that they just fucked in front of less than twenty-four hours ago.

One of Bucky’s eyebrows raises like he’s curious though. “What?” he asks.

Steve swallows, shaking his head. “Nothing, sorry,” he says, panicking as Bucky sets another log in his arms.

Quickly Bucky glances between him and the logs, his head shaking. The expression on his face a grin, yet almost worried. “What’s so funny?” he asks nervously.

And, nothing was funny Steve thinks. Nothing was funny at all; he just smiled like an idiot because no matter what he does right now he can’t get over Bucky. Everything about him: how red his nose is from the cold, the way he looked last night...every single thing about him last night- “Nothin',” Steve says honestly, trying to make it out as playful as he can.

Bucky scowls, “No tell me,” he grins some more, chuckling as he tries to pressure an answer out of Steve. 

“I can’t.” Steve deadpans. 

That earns him a light shove from Bucky, just a push in the chest. Bucky’s chuckling, rolling his eyes so it’s clearly not meant to be more than a joke, but Steve feels his foot snag in the snow, body sliding under the packed ice under his feet. 

Before he can brace himself he’s tumbling back, the logs in his arms falling to the ground so he can compensate and catch himself on the massive uncut lumber pile that is thankfully behind him. 

He lands on his ass on the stack of large logs, smaller cut ones hitting his feet in the process. His boots are thick, but he still feels the heavy wood as it tumbles down onto his feet. 

Looking up, Bucky has a shocked look on his face, a big grin and an open mouth like it’s hilarious but still an accident. 

“You asshole,” Steve blurts before barking out a laugh.

“It was an accident!” Bucky insists innocently before letting his eyes roll. “You started it anyway, laughing at me.”

Now it’s Steve's turn to roll his eyes. “I did not laugh at you.” Which is, in a way, A lie. He was laughing at him, just not in the way that Bucky thinks. 

“I literally saw you laugh at me.” Bucky says accusatorily as he crosses his arms defensively.

And- That's it, Steve thinks. He's never been good at just biting his tongue. “Well then, Buck, I’m so sorry that you doing anything is adorable and I just see you shivering and want to kiss the shit out of you. I apologize.” It takes him a split second after speaking to realize that maybe that was a lot to say in one go. He was aiming for funny but...That probably wasn’t funny, he thinks. 

Bucky, who's clearly thinking the same thing, goes silent, eyes blinking, still like a deer in headlights. 

“God I-” Steve babbles, trying to backtrack from the realization that what he said might have been very stupid and not at all something that either of them should be saying or hearing. “I'm so sorry that was incredibly stupid, I-”

Suddenly Bucky cuts in by saying “Steve,” loudly, successfully cutting Steve off. 

Steve's ready for rejection. His stomach drops in anticipation and he doesn’t know what to do to dig himself out but…

Bucky’s grinning. Why is Bucky grinning? he thinks to himself. 

But then Bucky speaks again. “You wanna kiss me?” he asks, cocky as usual. His cheeks are red and he’s...perfect. Steve wants nothing more than to just kiss the breath out of him.

“Duh,” Steve says, breathless. “That’s what I just said.”

Unexpectedly, Bucky steps towards him. His hands settle on the drawstrings of Steve's hood, feet knocking into Steve’s and he’s still got that stupid smirk on his face. He's just a few inches from Steve’s mouth, and Steve considers just leaning in and taking what he wants, eyes scanning from Bucky’s lips to his eyes for some confirmation that he can. 

“You're gonna have to ask real nicely,” Bucky says.

Before Steve can think twice he's babbling, “Please Buck, c'mon?”

Bucky edges in even closer, impossibly close and Steve can feel his warm breath on his jaw, hot compared to how cold he feels, and he lets his hands come up to grab onto Bucky’s hips. He's wearing this thick coat so Steve has to squeeze in to get ahold of him. “Can I kiss you?” he asks.

Bucky doesn’t respond, but Steve doesn’t really mind because he just tugs Steve in, kissing him hard and wet and so sudden that it makes Steve groan like it's the best feeling he's ever had in his life. 

—  
The next morning Steve wakes up with Bucky’s chest pressed against him, his arms wrapped around him, head against his chest and he's warm and comfortable. The memory of the night before still on his mind because if he thought the night in front of the fire was overwhelming, nothing can possibly compare to last night. 

Bucky’s legs wrapped around him, Bucky’s cock in his mouth, the way Bucky pleaded his name. God, now isn’t the time for his dick to get hard on him but it does because Bucky's right there against him and he feels the insatiable need to touch him endlessly. 

“Morning,” Bucky mumbles against his chest unexpectedly. 

Steve smiles, fingers combing through his hair as he says “Sorry,” around a breath of laughter. He knows already that Bucky can feel him hard against his hip.

He gets shut up with a kiss though, Bucky's hand coming down to touch him as he curls his hips into it.

He's got this overwhelming urge to tell Bucky how much he loves him the entire time but instead he focuses on how lucky he is just to have this.

—  
“How is everything going?” Natasha asks after Steve answers her call.

Steve responds with a genuine, “It's going good.”

But then she chimes in, “Did you both stop being stupid?”

That pushes laughter out of Steve, slightly frustrated, “I wouldn't say that. Still stupid, just...horny.”

“So you're fuckbuddies now?” she asks, a little judgy as always. 

“Nah,” Steve responds. “Just, not talking- yet.”

Bucky's outside, so Steve admits these things easily. He plans on saying something, he really does, but it just feels like there has been no actual moment to do it. They've been either screwing or ignoring each other since this whole thing started, and the last thing Steve wants to do is say, hey I have my dick in your ass, but I also want to confess that I’ve had feelings for you for a long time. 

Which, in retrospect, that could actually work...maybe. But Bucky makes him feel like he can't speak, and sex with Bucky makes him feel like his brain has just died. He doesn’t think he could produce a thoughtful sentence while they're screwing if he wanted to. He knows already that it would more than likely be the most inelegant confession of love in history and...Steve's not ready for that.

“Where is he?” Nat asks over the line. 

Steve's trail of thought had drifted entirely off, so it takes him a second to think, “He's talking to someone,” he says “I think they're supposed to scrape the way to get his car out.”

“Oh,” Nat chimes in, “That’s actually why I called...The managers need you both out by the morning to give us the money back.”

“Oh,” Steve says, the thought of leaving dawning on him much more quickly than he imagined. 

Because, really he hasn’t considered what might happen when it’s not just him and Bucky. When life and people are around and it's not just them alone and...that makes Steve swallow heavily, stomach curling. 

He doesn’t even know why that makes him sick with nerves but, it does. He has to try his best to sound normal as he says “Okay,” casually.

“They told me they'd go by today to make sure everything’s okay.”

“That’s probably who knocked then,” Steve guesses. 

He tries to finish the conversation with Natasha, but the entire time he can’t stop thinking about how the past few days have gone and how he doesn’t want it to end. But now he knows it will, which he thinks for a split second might be childish, but, in the moment, it feels heartbreaking.

—  
Bucky comes back in, shaking off some snow and chucking his wet boots onto a mat by the door. 

“My car is drivable,” Bucky says triumphantly as he tosses his coat off. He has a grin on his face until he looks towards Steve and it falters some. 

“That's great,” Steve responds, grabbing a few things together on the kitchen counter in preparation to leave. 

“Oh yeah,” Bucky starts. “We have to leave tomorrow.”

Steve smiles the best he can as he says, “Natasha told me.”

And, for a split second, Bucky’s grin drops. He breathes before he continues. “But hey, we still have today and tonight.”

—  
So, despite the need to pack up their things, instead they end up outside, rolling a snowman together the best that they can manage.

“The bottom is...kind of derpy,” Bucky says.

“It adds character.”

Bucky pats more snow down on the medium-sized ball of snow for the center, “I'm good with balls aren’t I?” he says. He’s got a big stupid smile on his face and it probably shouldn’t have Steve wanting to say how precious he is, but it does. Steve laughs, shaking his head. 

Instead of saying anything though, he picks up some snow and tosses it in Bucky’s direction. 

It lands against his ass and he turns to scowl in Steve's direction “You dick,” he says. 

Steve laughs, “I owed you payback anyway.”

Bucky's mouth drops in shock. “You fucking tackled me, you asshole, you already gave payback.”

And, oh yeah, Steve thinks, he did. “Fine, you can tackle me now.”

Bucky pauses, thinking about it as he pats the snowman, before turning in Steve's direction again. “Fine,” he agrees, stepping towards Steve.

But he doesn’t tackle him, just nudges him back once and then twice before shoving him down into the snow roughly. 

Steve belts out a laugh, watching as Bucky hovers above him. 

And- his dick is eye level to Steve’s face and he’s smirking mischievously like he's got a plan and that sends this overwhelming urge to kiss the hell of him shooting through Steve. 

So Steve grabs the seam of his shirt tight, tugging him down with him. 

Bucky doesn’t fall though, he lets himself drop to his knees, straddling Steve's lap easily. 

Steve lifts his hands from where they're gripping his shirt and he gets them wrapped around Bucky’s jaw, tucked into his hood. 

Bucky doesn’t even stall; before Steve can even get a chance to do it himself, Bucky is dipping in and kissing a breath right out of him. 

—  
They kiss in the snow until it gets too cold, finally fumbling inside to cuddle on the small space of the couch, Bucky laying on his chest. 

It’s warm, Bucky's breath hits the side of his neck and it makes him exhale like it’s punched out of him. 

Bucky laughs into his skin from how tense Steve gets, kissing in just because he knows it’ll push a groan out of Steve. 

And it does, everything Bucky does to him seems to.

Eventually, Bucky settles between his legs, halfway off the couch as he sucks Steve off slowly, Steve's fingers tangled into his hair to coax him on.

—  
Steve feels a mix of dread and what he thinks might be relief as they both pack up to leave the next morning. 

Dread because they're leaving. But relief because he hopes if anything this past week was just a reason for him and Bucky to figure out their shit. Whether it’s the way he’s hoping for or not. 

Steve didn't bring very much, so what he has is easily stowed away in his suitcase and zipped up. 

Bucky on the other hand is only halfway packed when Steve goes to ask him how he’s going. Steve assumes that it's probably partially from too much shit and also in part because of him procrastinating by checking his phone every minute or so. 

Steve asks anyway “Can I help?” 

Which earns him a very dramatic “Fuck yes.”

Steve laughs and steps towards him, that stupid feeling of his stomach swooping because he loves him probably more than he should and he thinks maybe it's too quick, but he approaches him anyway and easily asks “Can I have a kiss first?”

Bucky grins and his eyes roll, but Steve still sees his eyes brighten, pupils darkening as he nods out an “of course.”

So Steve kisses him like it’s nothing, like he’s done it a million times and...Steve’s mind quickly registers that he would be more than okay with that, as he pulls away. 

He gets the urge to tell him how beautiful he is, how he has the prettiest everything that Steve has ever seen- but, instead he just asks how he can help. 

They both pack his things up quickly, loading them into the car and then they clean the place up and...To Steve's dismay they're already leaving. 

—  
It's quiet in the car for the first hour of driving. Steve tries his hardest to stare at his phone as he thinks. 

He feels a little pathetic for not saying anything, but at the same time he's paralyzed at the thought of being denied. Not that he couldn’t handle it, he's just not sure what to think. Like, he considers, what if Bucky didn’t see it the way he sees it, what if to Bucky it was nothing? That thought alone puts a pit in Steve’s stomach.

Like he’s reading Steve's mind, Bucky speaks, “Hey, Steve,” he starts. 

Steve tries to keep his voice level as he responds with an easy “Yeah, Buck?”

There's a pause for a second, Bucky’s eyes shifting like he’s thinking, “Are we- gonna talk about it- or?”

Steve feels himself swallow and blink because he wanted to talk, yes, he absolutely does. But now that the moment is there he's at a loss for words, he opens his mouth to say something before Bucky interrupts him.

“We...don’t have to just, you can tell me not to and- that's okay.”

“No, I,” Steve chimes in, “I think we should.”

“Okay,” Bucky responds nervously, nodding. “So, are we-” he asks as if it’s a real question. 

Steve feels a surge of courage rush through him. His mind filling in the blank as he speaks it out loud, “Boyfriends?”

Bucky barks out a laugh, taking his eyes off the road to look at Steve affectionately. “Yeah,” he says.

Steve knows that he’s saying yeah to Steve's response, not that their boyfriends, just that Steve got the word right.

But just to be smug, Steve leans back into his seat and sighs out a contented “Good.”

That gets another laugh out of Bucky, one that makes his smile look like it’s uncontrollable and in love, and it makes his eyes shimmer. And...he doesn't question it, glances between Steve and the road as he says “Okay,” like he has nothing more to add, just okay I guess we're boyfriends now. 

Steve feels himself grin too because it's almost hysterical how easy that was. He feels himself chuckle as he reaches his hand over the console, offering his palm up for Bucky to hold.

Maybe it’s unsafe, he considers, maybe Bucky should use both hands to drive. But, Bucky takes ahold of it softly and Steve's too in love in the moment to care.

—  
They get Bucky’s things into his apartment relatively quickly, setting them down at the entryway of Bucky’s apartment. Natasha is inside, so on the last trip up the stairs, Bucky sets his final bag down on a step, tugging Steve in by the wrist.

“What?” Steve asks. 

“I just want a kiss before you leave,” Bucky responds, taking the opportunity to shove his hands into Steve's hoodie pocket to drag him in close. Which, Steve doesn't know why he’s into that so much but he is. 

“Just one kiss?” Steve asks teasingly, “One tiny kiss?”

Bucky rolls his eyes, managing to pull Steve in even closer, so close that his mouth is up against Steve's jaw, breathing against him. “No, a good one, to stave me off until I see you again.” 

And...Steve loves him, god he loves him so much, he chuckles. “I'm sure I'll see you tomorrow.” But he slides his hands up to Bucky’s neck anyway, lifting his head some. 

“I don’t care,” Bucky says, lifting up to press into a kiss on his own. He kisses Steve hard and wet and desperate from the start.

Steve feels like his heart is beating out of his chest as he kisses Bucky back like they're never going to kiss again. But, he’s never been happier than he is knowing that he can and he will and- he breaks the kiss just to say “I love you,” because he feels like he needs to.

Bucky grins, saying “I love you,” back before he starts yanking him back into a kiss again.

—  
Natasha is sitting on the couch when they get inside. She's got pajamas on and a bowl of something in her lap and Steve needs to get home soon, but he still decides to help Bucky anyway, carrying his suitcase in.

“So did you two plan the engagement?” she says lightly as they walk by. 

Quickly Bucky slings one of his bags onto their coffee table in front of her. 

Steve feels himself get a little red from the question. He knows that she knows, but it still feels so weird that anyone knows. It feels weird that it’s even real. 

But Bucky being Bucky rolls his eyes and tilts his head. “Engagement? Bitch, we were just trapped in a cabin for almost a week...That was the honeymoon.”

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are very appreciated. I'd tag tumblr but...ya know.
> 
> Happy holidays everyone!


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